Yes, Coffee Cup, I do.

My "Inside Out" coffee cup. If anyone on Earth should own this cup, I should.

I was thinking the other night about many things: Victorian hairstyles mostly (because I'm doing the Hair for Drood!!! WTF? I better not screw it up!), but also the chances I have been taking in the last year or two. About redefining what success in life means to me. Mainly because I was wondering (preparing myself) how I would handle it if/when I find out that I didn't get a part in "Tommy". Why wouldn't I be crushed, humiliated, devastated? 

Here's what I realized: EVERYTHING about this whole theatre experience is a Dream Come True for me.

Got an FRC pen and pencil to go with the Drood binder with my name on it? Yep. 

Taking a (much needed) dance class? Yep. (I'll try my best!)

Being able to be backstage, helping at shows? Yep. 

Being in a program? Yep. 

Getting a square of paper, indicating that I am on the cast and crew of a show and must park here? Yep. 

Walk in a Pride parade, supporting my beliefs? Yep. 

Taking an auditioning class? Yep.

Auditioning for a show? Damn straight Yep. ESPECIALLY YEP.

All of it, every moment/event/piece of paper is a dream come true. And here's why: these are all things I was sure I would be too afraid to EVER take part in. THE ANXIETY has kept my life very small. I have always been "too afraid to try that". "That" included a whole massive shwackload of things I loved, admired, hoped for, dreamed about my entire life. Things that were not on a "bucket list" because I never, EVER thought I would be able to overcome the intense anxiety that I felt. EVER. I was sure I would die before having the courage to do anything I dreamed of. But now, the desire has finally outgrown the fear.

So, if you're ever wondering why I'm excited about things that seem so small, that's why. And why I'll probably never lend you a pen again.